Tag: boyfriend

I’m not sure about you, but I get to know more and more couples practising the long-distance kind of relationship. This made me think and the result of my week-long thinking process was quite surprising to myself: I actually think it is possible! Maybe it is not that surprising after all, since I am on the move all the time.  Nevertheless,  I’ll even go further and say that it might be the better way of executing a relationship… well at least for me and the way I am thinking at the moment (but as we all know life is work in progress and attitudes can change). Coming out of a relationship in which we have been too close (distance wise not necessarily emotionally) this might be quite a refreshing alternative to try. And here is why I think it might actually work:  

Why it might work 1: a small world
In a world of the world wide web, emails, Skype, tablets, iPhones and what not it is reasonable easy to maintain a long distance relationship.  Everyone knows the fun that comes along at the beginning of reach relationship when couples still send cute messages to each other, telling each other “I miss you” in a message or at the end of a call (because they haven’t seen each for more than 5 hours). So why not prolonging this phase for a little longer?  Technology can make us feel only a few miles away while in reality it is hundreds or even thousands.  Someone told me recently that she hasn’t been to her new boyfriend’s house yet as he lives  a few hours away and he usually visits her, so they were skyping and he gave her a virtual tour though his house. Once you are tired of being able to talk but not able to touch,  you quickly book your next flight and off you go. Even that has become so easy and relatively inexpensive.

Why it might work 2: excitement
Despite the saying that a couple spending time apart is a couple in trouble, I think it can very well work out the opposite way. Nothing probably kills romance more than living on top of each other most of the time (oh yes.. experience is speaking). On top comes the excitement of the travelling. Each visit feels like a weekend away, you make it special! Oh and this reminds me of another advantage: you can let your hair grow in the time between and have it waxed just before you go! Great!

Why it might work 3: Independence
Especially when both parties are pursuing a career, a long distance relationship might have its advantages.. no one at home who is nagging about office hours, even if you spend half the night there you won’t be accused of infidelity. No obligations in terms of  household duties, like filling the fridge or cooking.. sounds relatively manageble to me.

Last but not least:
A long distance relationship is surely nothing that you want to keep up forever but I don’t see a problem in starting the relationship off like that. Of course, I won’t deny that there are also lots of cons but if both parties are committed then this definitely works out. Obviously it depends on the distance and surely not being spread over two continents with a  possibly time difference makes it easier, too.  Although even this might work. A prime example is my old flatmate from Germany who moved to India for her job and the love of her life is spending most of his time in the States (West coast to make it even worse; read: farther away). Perhaps, it is a new wave of attitude spreading through my generation: not necessarily seeing a relationship as a total symbiosis but whatever works best – even if it means jetsetting between two countries!